| londontown |
[Oct. 26th, 2007|11:42 pm] |
okay i dunno who still reads this anymore, but HI to anyone who does *waves*
for those who dont know (i really am not sure who reads this but whatever), im in LONDON. and i have been for the longest time, more than a month except i have been too lazy to update, and my livejournal layout couldnt be read on my computer so i gave up and used a preset one but i dont really care, as long as its readable and people can see pictures :]
generally london/lse/northumberlandhouse has been by far the most insane, eventful and fulfilling month of my life and its just been a month. eventful and insane for sure, fulfilling in the sense that i feel so much more independence than i ever did. the smell of fresh laundry and self-cooked food (which is not microwaved) is immensely satisfying, as is planning my own timetable and study schedule (well. or trying to,anyway) and going out whenever i want and generally doing whatever i wish. it is incredibly, incredibly liberating and i feel like i am already starting to mature which is a good thing.
i could not ask for a better roommate, for better friends, for better teachers (since everyone complains about the teaching standards at lse but so far ive loved all my classes, mostly anyway). i really have no idea why i was making such a big deal about everything, about leaving, about not going to america, etc.
my dorm is in the most amazing location EVER and the rooms are big enough and our room is nicer than most people's rooms :D people keep stealing our food from the kitchen though WHICH SUCKS sometimes people suck plus they steal the good stuff like ben and jerry's icecream (5pounds a pint omg) and our brownies :[
i also have not been sleeping enough, i feel like the excess sleep i have had for the past 9 months is not even going to make up for this. sleeping at 6am and waking up at 8am/9am for lectures and then going back and sleeping for a few hours and then the cycle repeats itself till its almost become routine. also i have been going out too much, student nights are getting boring and soon we will actually go to proper london clubs, like really nice places just when they are cheap :] and its strange that i go out more on weekdays and not on weekends, so ill be out on a tuesday night randomly and staying in on a friday night (like now.) which is strange.
its funny how i wrote a list of things that i have not done in my life before and in three weeks of being here most of it i had done for the first time hahaha ie getting drunk which is not fun after a certain point of drunkenness but yeah ANYWAY. i should really start reading more, and soon, because i have a TON of things to do but everytime i try to there will be a knock on the door or people would wanna go out or because my roommate is iso like me and we gossip so much we'll end up gossiping or talking to generally wasting the night away which is not good at all.
but for now ! i shall leave you with pictures because i dont have much else to say, or rather i have too much and i have no idea what to say
( london ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 31st, 2007|03:32 am] |
my blog smells of rotten cheese, stale and gross. i dont know what ive spend the past 7 weeks while dinika was here doing but now she's left so im bored and am watching oc marathons till 3am in the morning but its cool cuz oc warms my heart <3 im watching season2 which is decidedly the best season, ryan was funny not broody and season 3 was too full of drama and sadness and season4 was just. strange.
since its now friday im leaving in slightly less than 3 weeks, 20 days, i have no bank account and no medical check up yet and even when i have those things soon, early birthday and going away cards make me feel all strange and weird inside like im actually leaving, and leaving SOON, and while ive obviously known this and thought about this for the longest time i dont think im ready in any way to leave, though i am bored and vegetating here even though i have a million things to do. and i should learn to write in shorter sentences.
tomorrow! i am going to see HEROES stars on the heroes asia tour thing cuz joel got tickets and due to the show not showing on channel5, no one seems to be a big heroes fan (at least no one that joel knows) SO YAY I GET TO GO omg omg omg omg. too bad milo ventimiglia isnt coming to singapore though if he did i might just faint and die. but hiro and mohinder !! <3 <3 <3 SO EXCITED. should have bought heroes merchandise from newyork so they have something to sign on.
also i have begun planning my birthday party and now zan actually has a THEME haha which is going to be much fun. eventhough i cant celebrate my birthday properly since im leaving 4 days after and therefore when anyone is nice to me ill be reminded of how much im gonna miss everyone. oh well.
i should probably update with pictures sometime soon because from personal experience no one really likes words. and in the meanwhile i really should busy myself with all the many things i need to do and many people i want to meet and spend time with before i leave :( |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 8th, 2007|02:54 pm] |
as usual ive been way too lazy to update but i am back from america, have been for a week and IVE BEEN JETLAGGED ALL WEEK and now im finally back to semi-normal human hours. for a few days id stay up all night literally and go to sleep at 7am and wake up at 5pm, get ready to meet people for dinner. been spending the week meeting people for dinners because i have about two and a half months till i go/school starts (which is actually longer than most people because uk terms are slow) and ive missed people when i was in america so catching up is good :) too bad jon's still captured by the army in ocs i havent seen him for like a month plus tis terrible.
other than that ive been reading alot cuz there isnt much else to do and i have a ton of books. i finally discovered how good murakami novels are so ive been devouring them and norwegian wood is sooo good everyone must read it.
sister is back too, so the house has alot more noise than usual, in a good way. spent alot of time in america hanging out with her friends which was pretty cool cuz theyre extremeeely funny. and i shopped way too much, watched a mighty heart (about daniel pearl, starring angelina jolie) which was by far the hardest movie ive watched in a long time but soo good, and watched wicked which ranks up there with phantom because it was AMAZING and we had front row seats which was <3.
i am very lazy to upload many photos but i shall upload some, the rest are on facebook
( america! ) |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 8th, 2007|10:38 pm] |
i am very, very tired, i feel like i havent seen far too many people in far too long, and i have been falling sick, recovering and falling sick again for about three weeks now :(
i am sad i missed the crab date with evelyn and maddy thanks to my sore throat, and i feel like i dont have enough time to do so many things before i leave for like 3 weeks. leaving for chicago and newyork on tuesday, sisters graduation :) exciting but im not quite mentally prepared i dont feel like im leaving soon with all the buskersfestival work and im gonna be away for so longgg. i wish i had more time for myself, more time to read and watch things and generally bum around the house.
i think i am schizophrenic, sometimes i think its going to be so easy and such a relief to leave in sept and at other times i wish i were staying. its always extremes.
okay am too tired to type coherently i just thought an update was mandatory since i havent updated in a reallyreally long time.
and please visit www.buskersfestival2007.com thankyou :D |
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| chillicrab :]]]] |
[May. 19th, 2007|01:22 am] |
feeling like a withered leaf is not a fun feeling :(
today i went to some random arts house exhibition thing with chere for some meeting with a pretty weird/dubious guy, my first time to an art exhibition. never knew they were open to the public, and perhaps more importantly i never knew there was free wine and cheese. which is cool, cheese and free alcohol is always a good combination. and briefly attended a poetry reading by ng yisheng, tis not surprising at all why mrs perry loved him he seems like a male (and gay) version of her. but very very smart boy omgosh chere and i were in awe
wandered around boat quay before deciding to eat chillicrab because the whole place was lined with seafood restaurants and the crabs were tempting us. sadly i think we should have realised boat quay is a place which rips off tourists, and our crab was really expensive/really huge. if we didnt call abel to join us it would have been $101 between two people and half the crab unfinished, which is terrible. but crab is always <333. felt like a foreigner at boat quay, and international students really dont act their age, or rather dont act like average singaporean teens. which made us very worried about how different we'd be from our future classmates. rainy weather was nice, light drizzles make for the best sort of weather.
second photog photoshoot tmr at clarke quay/along the singapore river, probably my favourite place to take photos. little india was quite an experience, firstly all the bangladeshi workers thought i was interested in them and therefore wanted to take photos of them, so i stopped doing that after a while and stuck to photos of kids, random objects and buildings, etc. everytime i hear the photographer talking abt concepts behind photos and showing us works from famous photographers and philosophising (sort of) about photography i always feel like its one of those things i can do for the rest of my life, but probably will not because the only sort of photography i like is photojournalism, and i might stick to journalism as in just the writing bit of it because its easier to use that as a platform for other things
sleepy. but accomplished, so many bars confirmed in just two days yay :D
i also dreamt i was being scolded/adviced about my life decisions and told to be more practical, by the two people i think are the smartest among all my close-ish friends. which was really strange because both think what i plan to do and my future life plan is cool and respectable and blabla and that im not just following something that would be most practical, make the most money, etc. my only explanation is that its my subconscience telling me that perhaps i need to be a tad less idealistic and should start wondering how im going to feed my shopping habits in the future. but nahh i cant imagine myself being content with law or business and expect i wont be good at the other two more 'practical' courses (law=too technical, business=too much math and numbers, and im not emotionally strong enough or cut-throat enough to be successful at either) and cant imagine myself doing anything other than what i plan to do at uni. :]
i realise i have 3 months left here, exactly. im leaving in exactly four months but one will be spent in america, and till then ill be super busy, even busier than i am now, with buskersfestival, and then when i return ill be really busy with preparing to leave. a really sad but inevitable would be losing my place in all of my friend's lives, since almost everyone who is close to me will be here still. and then when i come back, class outings and random outings with friends would feel foreign and detached. also its really worrying because im not quite sure what the definition of friendships and relationships overseas is like, i fear that it wont be the same as what friendship means over here and then i cant replace the very important parts that my friends play in my life.
and also the huge burden of leaving my mummy here when i know she's going to miss me so very much :(((
AND i will really miss xiaolongbao and chillicrab i eat chinese food all the time now!! but four levels of topshop and people who seem like theyre really really nice (or on facebook,anyway) is reassuring.
mavis' birthday thing at oosh last week was fun, esp champagne and bakerzin cake. i need to stop indulging in bakerzin desserts after almost every meal with shiyun and expensive chinese restaurant food and champagne and things like that, and start living like a poor student which i will have to do in london :[
and because everyone always likes looking at pictures more than reading stuff,
( peektures ) |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 1st, 2007|12:13 am] |
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| |  tired | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | My Wish-Rascal Flatts | ] |
i went to school today, to get my o level cert certified. its strange to feel so familiar, so at home in the setting and so foreign looking around at the unfamiliar faces staring back. strange to see teachers who we were so used to seeing every day, and whose presence it is so easy to take for granted, for moments before they rush off to class etc. i really, really miss jc. and its so pointless to miss jc, at least if you miss people you could try to meet them again, try to catch up, and try to make things the way they were before. but for jc there isnt any trying, its impossible to replicate, even more so because we're all living such seperate lives.
sidenote, samjo i have missed you so! :)
and the 'another one!' comment from rolly was vaguely disturbing, who else is going to lse??? :(
very long day. i think i am sunburnt, though i dont know how in the world that happened.
LAST THURSDAY EVELYN AND I MADE DONUTS FROM SCRATCH. we are so KeWlzzZZ i cannot stand it.
the jam filled ones, with icing sugar :) i have tons more pics but im too lazy to edit them, the lighting was pretty bad. BUT THEY TASTED GOOD. now dinks is upset because she wants to be the best baker in the family. the weirdness thing runs in the blood, for sure.
also, Idol Gives Back was by far the best thing i've watched in a long time. the celine dion and elvis duet of if i can dream was truly amazing beyond words, i am fascinated at the wonders of technology. also i realised that i am too soft, hence the tons of tearing every 10 minutes, but it just stregthened my resolve to want to actually do something good, to do something that will make life better for some group of people on at least a small scale. i am excited to see what i can make of my life, what good i can do with it, and what i can achieve.. in real terms. beyond grades and similarly meaningless things like that, beyond pretty slips of paper and certs.
i miss my friends, which goes back to the missing school thing(again). it is rare to be perfectly listened too, perfectly understood and to perfectly understand what someone else is trying to say. thank you; strange that it took so freaking long to finally talk about things which i have been wondering about for maybe 4-5 months, and longer. i dont think i ever appreciated how much your presence and talking to you reminds me of me.
everyone around me defines me in various ways, keeps me grounded keeps me who i am and keeps me having the beliefs, perceptions, ambitions, etc. that i have. in a way this country, this whole place and everyone in it keeps me who i am. and i like who i am, weirdness and all, and i dont want to change, but i know i will. and then i dont know how much everything here will mean anymore. on one hand im all 'ohhh no singsoc! meet totally new people do totally different things change everything become assimilated into life there OHH SO EXCITING' on the other hand i dont want to loose this and i love all of this, everyone here, the person i am here, way too much. little miss contrary indeed
and i find it tragic that topshop is more exx in london than it is in singapore.
i need to read more so i can allow myself to buy 'dispatches from the edge' by anderson cooper because ive banned myself from buying anymore books until ive finished at least one more (i have 6-7 unread ones)
and i think people assume im damn free cuz im not working. but actually im not okay !! bmdp keeps me preoccupied. more than.
OKAY MORE DONUT PHOTOS SOON. tomorrow: CHEEESECAKE. <3 |
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| work free life :D |
[Apr. 18th, 2007|12:35 am] |
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| |  content | ] |
i feel tremendously liberated not having a job and waking up whatever time i like because thats this is the only time ill ever be able to do this before university starts. and working at sph was getting terribly repititive and boring.
been busy from time to time, had a three day law job, i was supposed to help the lawyer type stuff in court but the case was settled before it went on trial how unexciting. i realise that being a lawyer might be interesting from time to time, and going to court was quite a thrilling experience, seeing a huge range of human emotions all-round the court. but its not something i can imagine myself doing in the future, not something i particularly want to study, and not something i think i have the emotional strength or hardness to pursue. and drafting legal documents and letters are very technical and dry in my opinion. and its too..i dont know, safe? like its a ricebowl profession. which is good but im too idealistic and i want something which will allow me to travel and work at different places like journalism :)) so yup. i guess that sod rta reaffirmed my decision in life. though the lawyers client, a CEO of some company, was telling me i should put more consideration into my future prospects etc etc etc. prospects being $$. singapore is far too practical really.
i cant remember what ive been doing and where ive been going recently hm. met zan shiyun cheryl and tong for dinner, at mirchi (indian restaurant) after walking around and getting semi lost on the way to boat quay from cheryl/shiyun's office building. so we decided to just eat at far east square. as usualy i was a failure indian and couldnt really order food properly. we ordered 10 naans without realising theyre not the size of prata (how could i not know that o_o) and the guy told us to order less lol how embarrassing. food was pretty good though but i still prefer chinese food (ie: xiaolongbaos and noodles etc). had fun laughing at zan's retardedness, i miss sch and it sucks that everyones in army !! boo. i miss the guys' nonsense and the tons of fun we had just sitting in the canteen and talking and talking. somehow nowhere is as conducive for talking as rj canteen, we realised collectively.
IN OTHER NEWS! i can bake now :D hot chocolate & marshmallow cupcakes were a success followed by the stuff i learnt how to make at the baking class i attended with colleen, yay :D
( cupcakes )
mmm cupcakes :) shall attempt making more random things tmr. had lots of fun baking with shiyun mavis and jon the day before jon went to army, and playing arnd with my macbook too. pop art effect is v cool.
last french lesson this thurs, then photography classes start next week. i have tons of books to read and ive just finished shantaram, one of the richest and most amazing books ive read in my life. no book covers that much ground, that much about human nature, about love and life and religion and family and everything else. and! ive bought a few of my preliminary readings for my government course. i feel gainfully occupied (despite the waking up late) and liberated from the mundaneity of my previous life working. and with tons of stuff to do for the buskers feste tis all good.
america in (less than) two months !! can hardly wait. :)
i will be in london in around 5 months and i still cant pick my predominant sentiment about leaving. hm.
i hope there is good chinese food and xiaolongbaos in london. i really much prefer chinese food to indian food i am so confused ethnically. and i also hope i get my first choice hall!! garh. |
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| lse |
[Apr. 4th, 2007|05:29 pm] |
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| [ | Current Music |
| | Eyes - Rogue Wave | ] |
so, since my only other option isnt quite the best option, i am going to go to LSE in around 6months, probably shortly after my birthday. its nice that its finally decided (more because there arent any other viable options :| ) and now i can get on with life and be excited about my future once again.
i have such a wonderful amazing family and i am extremely, extremely blessed :]
and! i love america too much to not study/work there. so i shall aim for postgrad(columbia journalism sch!). and enjoy london and europe in the meanwhile. its painful yes but its also really not that bad and its so easy to focus on the positives, so i shall, and stop worrying my family/friends cuz life really isnt that bad at all. and perhaps this really is for the best :)
and i also have amazing friends <333. who make things alot better. thankyou, really! stef esp <3
TMR IS MY LAST DAY OF WORK! i am looking forward to a life of bumming. but i will also read alot alot alot and watch tons of dvds and improve my photography skills and learn to cook and do laundry and basically prepare myself for uni in case i burn the entire hall down or have all pink clothes because i dont know how to do anything.
but i shall miss the colleagues, colleen esp <3 and steph (who is already gone) and geri and ben and brend stef etc who are always nearby, though not quite colleagues.
america in juneee for dinika's graduation! two weeks in nyc is lovee. i cant wait. life is very exciting and promising, really. :) |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 2nd, 2007|12:20 am] |
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i dont think ive ever felt more alone in my life.
and it truly feels like these 12 years in the singapore education system, and 12 years(or longer) only wanting one thing, has amounted to nothing. |
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